Ok, two things. First off... SPOILER ALERT HARRRRRD FOR STAR WARS EP. 7. Second thing. MERRRRRY CHRISTMAS!!1

Cool. It's the last regular season Battle of the season (wut) before we get to the Battle Royale so let's make it count. It's the anonymous bad guy from the new Star Wars movie, Kylo Ren (Andy), vs. the supernonymous rapping Shaq genie from one of the worst things of the 90s, Kazaam (Dan). And duh, it's in Santa's Workshop. Dope.

Battlecasts roasting on an open lightsaber.

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We noticed we had been way too topical with our character and battleground choices as of late so we decided to do things that are completely irrelevant to anything going on in pop culture right now. It's Hyrule's Female-Identifying Male Link (Dan)... or vice versa...  going head to head with the main dude in Stephen King's Dark Tower series Roland Deschain, The Gunslinger (James). Sudden Valley is the Bluth family development of astoundingly poorly build homes if you didn't follow.

It's raining Battlecasts. Hallelujah.

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It is a period of civil Battlecast.
Andy's Rebel spacedicks have won
many victories against James and
the evil Galactic Empire.

Today marks the final showdown between two Sith titans. Dark Maul (James), a Zabrak from Dathomir will face off against one of the most powerful and hilariously controversial Lords of the Dark Side, Jar Jar Binks (Andy)

Let's join the two in the famed Mos Eisley Cantina and see how it all unfolds on today's episode of Battlecast.

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Welcome back to Battlecast friend of the show, Ryan Kidd along with BC newcomer (and Dan's bandmate in Gravyyard) Joe Mousey. Today's battle takes place in the much beloved classic American Gladiators arena. The combatants are the also much beloved Peter Dinklage (Dirk for Dan) and much unknown Ezra (Ryan for Andy), a padawan from Star Wars Rebels. Apparently it's a pretty good show. Most of us still need convincing.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Battlecast?

Warning: Music.

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Allllllll aboard the Starship Enterprise! That's the Star Trek themed battleground in today's extra girthy episode of Battlecast. We'll be duking it out in space with two sort-of aliens. It's the biggest, baddest, smartest Pokemon around, Mewtwo (James) vs. the tongue waggingest, alienest, Spider-Man counteringest villain out there, Venom (Dan). Pretty legit, huh?

TIL (today i learned) The L in Samuel L. Jackson stands for Battlecast.

Warning: Tijuana, Mexicast

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STATUS UPDATE: How are we doing on our anti-grosscast challenge? Astoundingly well.

You know what one of the dankiesest movies ever is? Forrest Fucking Gump. So let's hope the wheel landed on it this week as our battleground. It did. Today's combatants are the Tomb Raider herself, Lara Croft (James) vs. a hypothetical main character from any of the Fallout games, A Vault Dweller (Dirk for Andy).

Lucy in the Sky with Battlecast.

Warning: Tom Raider

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Dun dunun dun nunnnnnn... It's Faaaaaamily Feudcast. Once in a while we do awesome gameshow style episodes that you guys looooooooove.

Who better to be contestants on Family Fued than the jerkwad that's always tryna kill Bart Simpson, Sideshow Bob (Dan) vs. renaissance era painter, sculptor, inventor, and etc. Leonardo da Vinci (Andy). It's rad.

Battlecast a gong. Battlecast it on.

Warning: LOUIEEE ANDERTHNNN!!!11

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ANNOUNCEMENT!! We have put a three week ban on all grossness after last week's horribly disturbing episode full of things you'd never want your mom to hear.

Today's battle is between a real fast guy and a real purple guy. It's The Flash (Dan) from the pretty damn decent CW show vs. The Phantom (Dirk for James) featuring Billy Zane aka the bad guy from Titanic. It allllll goes down in our hometown of San Diego.

It puts the Battlecast on the skin or else it gets the hose again.

Warning: "No James so it's going to be shitty." -James

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Welcome to Grosscast! The grossest podcast in alllllll the world. Featuring Andy the Gland Boyd, Dirk "I-Just-Pooped Smirk" Stenger, James "I-Just-Came" Pugh, and Dan Brozo. If you really thought you couldn't listen to Battlecast at work before.....

Anyway- today's battle is in the ol' Halloween spirit being judicated by Dan in Nightmare Before Christmas. It's Arrow (James) of CW and maybe DC Comics vs. Mulder and Scully (Andy) the original paranormal activity-ers from X-Files.

Making Battlecast, la-la-la la-la.

Warning: So gross.

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It's like nothin' you ever heard before! It's the Battlecast Happy Hour! Basically all that means is that we got drunk and recorded an episode of just banter. We get the real scoop on paying for HJs, saving people's lives with the heimlich, and of course, bidets.

Warning: Dan will open your face.

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Woooo Nelly, another one of our hilariously short seasons down the ol' drain again with an episode so long is sure to break records or at least your attention span.

Battle Royale means we get to use our characters WITH WHOM we've won througout the season- another even season with each of the boys coming to the plate with 3- Dan's rag tag crew of ragamuffins in Pablo Escobar, Master Chief, and Ant Man. James's bunch of bawdy brawlers is Hillary Clinton, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and Caprica 6. Andy's slew of soldiers is  Rick (of Rick and Morty), Nightcrawler (not Jake Gyllenhaal), and President Nicolas Cage (waht?).

Never wear Battlecast without the Blue.

Warning: Go into this one with an open analogy-box.

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Today on Battlecast, the boys try to piss off the non-present (for the first time ever) Dan by doing a Futurama episode in his absence. It worked a little. Friend of the show Alex guest judicates. It's leader of the mutants Raoul (Andy) vs. Bender's good-twin Flexo (James) vs. kung-fu fighting space pilot Leela (Dirk). They all enrolled at Mars University for this one, kiddos. Also in true BC form, we talk about crapping our pants and handjobs.

ALL HAIL THE HYPNOCAST.

Warning: It's like we haven't aged a day.

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BOOM SHOW CAMEO! It's Jon Bailey of HONEST TRAILERS. They're trailers, and they're honest. Go watch them.

"Honest Trailers are awesome." -Andy aka a guy who doesn't like 99.9999% of things.

James is absent today, but we somehow manage to seem pathetic anyway. Ahhh just kidding James, you're great. Today its two characters who you've probably never even considered thinking about meeting each other. It's drug kingpin and failed politician Pablo Escobar (Dan) vs. potentially androidical future-cop and main character of Blade Runner and the Philip K. Dick novel "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep", Rick Deckard (Andy). Dirk judicates and the ol' wheel put us in Big Boss's Mother Base from the new (really solid [get it?]) Metal Gear Solid Game.

In certain cultures it is actually considered a compliment to Battlecast at the dinner table after eating a meal.

Warning: Epic voice by epic guest.

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Today on Battlecast: Andy judicates our battle in a place from a show no one's ever watched. It does actually sound pretty solid though. Twin Peaks. Dan picks one of his most nostalgia-serving characters yet. Master Chief (Dan). You remember Halo parties with your boys, getting into latently homosexual antics around a 27 inch CRT tv. Was that just Dan? Oh well. On to James. He made a very controversial [you'll see why] move in picking Maleficent (James). It's got all the spine-tingling twists and turns of a lazy river!!!

I don't wanna waiiiit. For our Battlecasts to be ovvvver.

Warning: Jamesy want his ba-ba?

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Guys I'm really tired and kinda jacked up from the motorcycle accident you'll hear about on this episode so I'm gonna keep this short. Sorry for being a gayby. It's America's national treasure Nick Cage (Andy) vs. stealth alien commando Predator (Dirk for Dan). All goes down on capitol hill 'cause like we keep current with news and stuff.

We motion for a Battlecast. All in favor? The nays have it.

Warning: Wear a helmet.

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It's election season! The only season that lasts the duration of like 25 normal seasons! We love it! And to prove how much we love politics and what-not, we're pitting the might Apprenticer himself, Donald Trump (Andy), vs. Hillary "Hill-Dawg" Clinton (James). Today the wheel of destiny lands on a map from Blizzard's newest MOBA [you know, games like League of Legends and DOTA] to hit the streets, Heroes of the Storm.

Houston, we have a Battlecast.

Warning: Try not to smaste anything gross.

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It's the ciiiiiiiircle of Battlecast.

Warning: Battlecasters be cheatin'.

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Stop, drop, and listen to Battlecast.

Warning: Record number of Ds dropped.

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Ant-Man (Dan) was pretty dang good. Go check it out. Also bring this episode of Battlecast in on a boom box and blast it 90s style. Also while listening to Tom Waits (Dirk) on a Walk-Man.

James is still out of town. We actually vaguely miss him. He's in Germany, and that's where our Battleground gon' be this week too.

Fill the reservoir with floating black balls, it's Battlecast season <3

Warning: Hope you like Tom Waits.

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WHEN TWO TIME TRAVELING DUOS SPILL BREW, WHO WILL DO TRAVAILING IN TIME TO WIN?!?

It's just the three musketeers today. Not that other guy. Ummmm. James! Yeah James. That guy. Is some'a our faves today. Rick and Morty (Andy) vs Doc and Marty (Dan) battling in a game that Dan and Dirk have been playing wayyyy to much'a. Rocket League. Enjoy.

Awwwwwww, biiiiiiitch, it's Battlecast <3

Warning: This show is icky.

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It's season 7 yay woo rad awesome. After 6 seasons, you don't have time to caps lock exclamations.

Fraggle Rock is rad. It's the battleground. Roger Rabbit (Andy) is classic and awesome. He's a combatant. Buffy (James) was mildly watchable and inexplicably much beloved. She's fightin' too. Battlecastin' time.

ARE YOU READY TO RAAAAAWK???! Us neither.

Warning: Lotsa TV show talk.

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Congratulations to us on our 64th episode! It was like two months ago, but now we're finally celebrating it with one of our vaguely famous 'tween season Specials.

It's 4 all time N64 faves: Turok (Dan) vs. Banjo Kazooie (Dirk) vs. James Bond (Andy) vs. Waluigi (James)

It's guest judicated by fantasy novelist and overall man of mystery, Elnath Trev-dawg Shanks of the CurseBorn Sage. He spun the wheel that landed us on Koopa Troopa Beach from Mario Kart 64.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Battlecast?

Warning: Andy sexualizing video game characters again.

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It's that magical time of year again where cosplayers roam the streets, and we get drunk and roam the Comic Con floor and say things we'll probably regret later. Later as in now.

It's Dan, Dirk, Andy, James, and Dave with a smattering of battles with people dressed as things.

COMIC CON 2015 WOOOOOOOOO.

Dan - "I'm drunk, James, do you wanna write the copy for this week's episode."

James - "Yesh."

It's that time y'all! Andy brings his pitiful bunch of nobodies: Cthulhu, Gypsi Danger, and Buckaroo Banzai in an attempt to ruin this episode. Dan fronts with his crew: Mad Max (not the cool new one), One of the Battletoads, and the awesome Geralt of Rivia so he can try and seem relevant. James However knows how to pick some characters. James’ posse consists of agent extraordinaire Ari Gold, the unkillable Jason Vorhees, and the granddaddy of them all Mickey Mouse. If James doesn't win this it rigged. Battlecast urbody!!

Make sure you've updated to the latest version of Battlecast to avoid compatibility issues.

Warning: Dirk's 5 week plan.

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Today on the show James ruins everything. Poor planning on his part left us having to delay for the Battle Royale for which we're all waiting. That'll be next week. In the meantime, we bring you a whole buncha good topics such as Corn Nuts, older ladies, and thoughts on the Oculus Rift.

For the battle itself, Dan and Andy butt their buttheads twice in a row for two quick-fought fights. First it's Zorro (Dan) vs Robin Hood of Men in Tights (Andy), and then it's Parappa the Rapper (Andy) vs Crash Bandicoot (Dan).

All we wanna do is have some fun. Until the sun comes up over Battlecast Boulevard.

Warning: Stinky snackfoods are stinky.

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Today on the show we welcome esteemed guests and damn fine podcast moguls, Anthony Silva and Ashley Taylor of the Pixelated Geek network. You've probably heard us talk about these two before. They're rad.

Andy wusses out and makes Anthony battle for him (ok really Anthony just wanted to battle. Big time.), and he chose everyone's favorite Street Fighter, Ryu (Anthony4Andy). Dan chose one of his favorite team of NES originating amphibians, The Battletoads (Dan). And what an odd twist of events! We're battling in the completely unexpected floor of E3?!? WHADDUYAH KNOW!!!

Careful of the thorns. Battlecast has a lot of pricks.

Warning: Apple or PC?

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Did you guys hear?! Nintendo is going to build a wing at Universal Studios. Whaaaaaaat?

So needless to say, that's our battleground this week. It's cannibal serial killer Hannibal Lecter (James) vs. this super obscure 80s movie character that Andy apparently is real into all of a sudden, Buckaroo Bonzai (Andy).

Something something something Battlecast.

Warning: Conjecture and hear-say.

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Dan's drunk so he's gonne keep this short. Ari Gold (James) from Entourage vs. Harry Hart (Dan) from Kingsman. Two subjectively bomb-ass pieces of fiction. Go watch them. The battleground is Big Trouble in Little China. Andy's on an 80s kick.

Put the lime in the Battlecast and drink it all up.

Warning: Probably more porn talk. Sorry.

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WE LOVE ANNEKE!!! Y'know, Dirk's fiance. Also a super heroine that will forever go unnamed. Butt-Stuff Girl! She's on the episode.

This week we do some things. Like eat candy and talk about racism and porn. Sounds boring right? WRONG! Dan is really not sober so he calls in his trusty Dirk to do his bidding. Andy chooses one of the greatest action stars that Gen X never knew it missed, Kung Fury (Andy). Dirk picks the bro-tagonist from the game that everyone is raving about right now, Geralt of Rivia (Dirk) aka The Witcher. James spun the wheel that definitely exists and it put us in Quahog, Rhode Island- the home of the Griffin Family from the ever-polarizing Family Guy.

Ten thousand years in a Battlecast will give you such a crick in the neck! See a chiropractor before symptoms worsen.

Warning: Olympic-level Candy Mouth-Catching

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Hey you guys! A girl was on the show again!!! However she is married. And she's James's sister. Time for some dirt, right? Mayyyyyybe.

Today's battle pits the famous video game character from Kingdom Hearts, Mickey Mouse (James) vs. that dragon thing from those Peter Jackson movies, Smaug (Andy). Dan just watched Chappie, so we added Neill Blomkamp's South Africa/District 9 to the wheel and whadduyuh know, it picked itself.

4 out of 5 dentists choose Battlecast. And the 5th one brushes with baking soda. Ew.

Warning: TOO MUCH "HOMEWARD BOUND" TALK IS THE EXACT RIGHT AMOUNT

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"OHHHH NOOOOO JAMES ISN'T THERE!? THAT SUUUUUCKS!!!11" said no one ever. JK we love James. Almost as much as when he isn't there. Burrrrrn. But in all seriousness, Battlecast. Lol right?

Dan picks one of his favorite characters evvvvvver and the protagonist of one of the bombest trilogies of Australian New Wave cinema to date, Mad Max (Dan). Dirk is sitting in for James in his absence and picks a character James is sure to hate, Jon Snow (Dirk). Who cares though because Jon Snow is the bomb ass dank ass gangster level boom boom. Oh yeah, and it allll goes down at Elon Musk's Tesla Gigafactory.

Don't forget to charge the batteries, Battlecast really drains the juice.

Warning: THE AUDIO IS ALL F'ED UP AT THE END WE'RE SORRY SORRY SOZ

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Who the hell is Gypsy Danger (Andy) you rightfully ask? The main Jaeger from Pacific Rim. Yes, that ol' rat-fink Andy is holding true to his commitment to piss James off by being only gigantic characters in this season of Battlecast. Dan on the other hand is still picking totally fair and well-balanced characters such as DIABLO (Dan) THE LORD OF ALL THE FEIRY PITS OF HELL AND SUCH.

Surgeon General Warning: Shake well before opening, this episode contains artificial humorings.

Additional Warning: There's a lot of weird porn out there.

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Our names is… Dan-zula, the dice rula, the pants poo-a, you wanna strip, he’ll watch ya do it. Dirklock and he's on lock, research you like a rock (geologically), Andwad, you up next with your hangy-blocks. Andwad make an honest living see, Andwad get a smattering of honeys G, Drivin' in his beemer, lookin’ like a flamer, Watches on his fingers and his toes and he's a Capricorn.

Uh! Check-check it, yeah.

Cause we are the Battle Teens, make the homies say ho and other homies wanna scream! Battle Teen Podcast Squad, Number one in the hood, G. Oh yeah and also James.

Ultron (James) vs. Cthulhu (Andy) in Aqua Teen Hunger Force House

Make sure to butter the pan before you insert the episode, it's time to flip Battlecast!

Warning: Andy is ungrateful.

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Yaaay! No more crappy 'tween-season filler crap. It's finally here! Season 6 HAS ARRIVENED.

We blast right off into the ethosphere with an episode full of kick-ass ass-kicking and spine-tinglingly droll stories from the Battlecast dudes.

Today's battle is the queen of Metroid-killing, Samus Aran (Dan) vs. the creepiest looking guy in a hockey mask after Alexander Ovechkin (google it), Jason Vorhees (James). Allllll of this goes down in the world famous theme park, Itchy and Scratchy Land!

We fight. We fight. We fight and fight and fight. Fight, fight, fight. Fight, fight, fight. The Battle and Casty shooooooooow.

Warning: No open bar.

Records reset after last season:
Dan 0-0, Andy 0-0, James 0-0

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It's that time of the year while between official seasons of Battlecast, we record a bunch of random nonsense and try to run it past you guys as a real episode. We know it doesn't work, but we do it anyway. This week's version of that is ZOOCAST!

We went to the world famous San Diego Zoo and recorded a mishmash of observations with an actual battle in the middle of it. In today's animal themed battle, it's DC's mostly ridiculous Animal Man (Dirk) vs. the main character from the late 90s Transformers spin-off Beast Wars, Optimus Primal (Dan). The battleground is of course, the SD Zoo.

Remember to keep your palms flat as you feed the podcasters their designated feeding pellets. It's time for Zootlecast.
 

Warning: Andy was a Llama in a past life.

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It's finally here folks- the super shitty audio we were left with from our live show. due to a series of very Battlecast-eqsue technical difficulties, the listenable audio from our live show was lost in an abyss of dismembered genitalia and Andy's tears. So this will have to do if you wanna get a taste of how our live show went.

It's Captain Planet (Dan) vs. the T1000 robot (Andy) at Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.

Suck in your gut, there are ladies present- it's time for Battlecast.

Warning: Thanks for coming to our show. Better turn-out than we could have expected.

And as always, thanks for listening, reviewing, and telling a friend about our show. Means more to us than you'd ever know.

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT'S BEEN 5 SEASONS O' THIS?!?

We hardly can, but we are super grateful and honored that you guys have stuck around and shared the gospel of Battlecast with anyone who wouldn't be immediately disgusted by the prolifically phallus-related discussions.

James is coming in hot with 5 characters- Cloud Strife, Agent Smith, Joe Fattone (lol), Dexter, and Scarecrow. Andy's doing aight with Godzilla, Brain (no Pinky), and Sonic the Hedgehog. And Dan... oh Dan. He didn't win a single match this season himself. He's got Mulan. And Maybe Space Ghost.

Grasp the ancient monkey paw betwixt your fingers, but be careful what you wish for; it's time for Battlecast.

Warning: LIVE SHOW IS TOOOOONIGHT

Records after last episode:
Dan 1-5, Andy 3-3, James 5-1

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BOOM! DIRKEO!! That's right folks. Everyone's favorite member of Battlecast will be sitting in to fight on Andy's behalf. Our story takes place in the Italian Renaissance where Sonic the Hedgehog (Dirk) engages in mostly mortal combat against the boomstick and chainsaw weilding Ash Williams (Dan) from the Evil Dead and Army of Darkness movies.

Close your eyes and wish to God that the Angels will finally win the pennant- here comes  Battlecast, here comes Battlecast, right down Battlecast Lane.
 

Warning: James is drunk.

Records after last episode:
Dan 1-4, Andy 2-3, James 5-1

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We hold absolutely to the fact that if anyone ever gets "fired" from Battlecast, it'll be James. Why? LOOK AT THE FUCKING CHARACTERS HE PICKS OMG WTF?!?

Yes, he also does horrifically moronic stuff that makes for great stories but really? N fucking SYNC? Ok fine. You do you James.

Through the power of music, NSYNC (James) comes out to the setting for Umbrella's T-Virus outbreak from Resident Evil to take on the sorta-blind maniacal madman, Riddick (Andy).

Start inflating, the stewardess will be with you shortly. It's time for Battlecast.
 

Warning: Teenage versions of the BC boys were arguably even sicker. And not like socal sick. Just sick.

Records after last episode:
Dan 1-4, Andy 2-2, James 4-1
 
 
 
 
Enjoy!

We would like to publicly apologize for the fact that every single episode of this show quickly devolves into wiener-jokes. We never intended this to happen, but apparently if you put a few pathetically immature dudes in a room together, eventually they just start talkin' 'bout peens.


Thankfully that's not allll we talk about on this week's episode. We also battle. One of the greatest thing to come out of the 90s, Earthworm Jim, takes on another great child of the 90s, Agent Smith from The Matrix trilogy. Hey and for once we're actually timely on a cultural reference and we're fighting at Coachella 2015. Hooray, us!!

So apply the ointment while we prep the cortizone, it's time for Bonercast. Battleboner. Bonerbattle. Battlecast. Yeah that one.

 

Warning: Prepare to miss Dirk.

Records after last episode:
Dan 1-3, Andy 2-2, James 3-1
 
 
 
 
Enjoy!

Ever wondered what it would be like to spend an afternoon in Andy's room in Toy Story? Us neither. Also this episode won't satisfy that craving at all. Frankly, I don't know why I opened this description with that question. I blame the pain killers I'm on. WOOOOOO. It's the dynamic rodent duo Pinky and the Brain (Andy) vs. the enigmatic slave to his all-powerful father's wishes, The Prince (Dan) from the Katamari Damacy series. As previously stated, this thang-a-rang goes down in the Toy Story universe.

Pucker up your buns and pop in some ear-buds, cuz this Battlecast shiz be NSFW as F.

Warning: Heavy debate over the best Toy Story movie.

Yes, we are all tearing through House of Cards right now. But why not take a break and see how ol' Francis Underwood (Andy) would handle duking it out against one of Batman's arch-nemesises, The Scarecrow (James). And heck- why not have the whole thing go down on the set of Saturday Night Live?! Why not indeed...

Tie one on and inject your veins with the warm gooey goodness that is Battlecast.

Warning: Emotions run hot toward the end there.

It's one of the most epic battles in Battlecast history. Two of the ballerest protagonists in all of the late 90s. It's the most dangerous man in the world, with a bounty of 60 billion double dollars on his head, The Humanoid Typhoon, Vash the Stampede (Dan) of the much beloved anime, Trigun. He meets former soldier, wielder of materia, and main character of one of the most acclaimed RPGs of all time, Cloud Strife (James). All this goes down in none other than a map from Team Fortress 2. Perfect right? You'll see.

It's time to strap in and watch the world go KABOOM in this weeks installment of Battlecast.

Warning: Andy is the most confusing judicator ever.

It's a very Valentime's Battlecast episode featuring more girls than have ever been on an episode of the show. What started as Dan vs. Andy then transformed into Dirk vs Andy which then transformed into Dirk's female guest vs. Andy's female guest. The girls choose Disney characters and we pull out our Disney themed wheel which places us in Agrabah. It's Elsa (Ava + Andy) vs. Mulan (Anneke + Dirk).

It's a whole new world of shitty Disney cross-overs. We love you.

Warning: Best. Hashtags. Ever.

Welcome to the Australian Outback! A wonderful place where swarms of koalas and Crocodile Dundees run rampant. Andy has chosen the king of monsters, Godzilla (Andy), and James has picked one of his favorite characters of all time, The Man in Black (James) from everyone's favorite annoyingly question-not-answering ABC show, LOST.

It's Japanese radioactive super-monster vs. a mythical smokey enigma. Woo.

Warning: Be prapared to fear for your genitals.

HAPPY ONE-YEAR BATTLECAST-VERSARY!!!! Yes. We've been doing this for a year now. And what do have to show for it save a lot of stories about handjobs and soiled trousers? A lot of fond memories, that's what!

We kick season 5 off (get it? oh wait I haven't mentioned the battleground yet...) at the big American Football game that decides the winner for that given year. The S***R B**L!!!!! It's Dan as adventure-loving canine, Jake the Dog (Dan) and James as enigmatic justice-killer, Dexter (James)! Who's going to take home the S***R B**L ring? Is T*M BR**Y going to throw for over 200 yards? Is R**SELL WI**ON going to do things too??! Maybe.

Warning: Sorry sports-fans.

Frasier. Seinfeld. Friends. What do they all mean?

Hell if we know- we just make them engage in mortal combat... Andy as Chandler Bing, Dan as George Costanza, and Dirk as Dr. Frasier Crane- it's the Sitcom Showdown to end all Sitcom Showdowns. Also for some reason the fight takes place at a Buffalo Wild Wings in Minneapolis. We'll explain.

Warning: Some of the best stories in Battlecast history.

Enjoy and Tell a Nerdy Friend!

What on earth do you mean, Resurrection Cast?

Isn't it obvious?! We get to pick characters from the past that have died and if we win with them- we get to use them in Season 5! Pretty rad-badical, no? Andy has brought back to life, the trundling flop-master, Dick-Butt. James picks his favorite (and everyone elses least favorite) Lady Gaga. Lastly, Dan chose the first character to ever die on the show- Space Ghost.

Warning: Dan's childhood was sad.

Enjoy and Tell a Nerdy Friend!

4 (Dan) vs. 3.5ish (James) vs. 2 (Andy)
 

You know the rules, people. Each of our winning characters from throughout Season 4 are back as our respective champions. Dan's team of four includes Raphael, Nicola Tesla, Sarah Kerrigan, and Bowser. James's three-and-a-half-man squad is Annie, Deadpool, and the mortally wounded Captain Falcon. Last and most definitely least, Andy's gruesome two-some stands with Deadpool and Agent Coulson. To the winner goes the spoils! Meaning the Katana Trophy and a spoonful of pride.


Warning: WHAT of the month club?


Record after last episode... Andy 2-4, Dan 4-2, James 3.5-3.


Enjoy.

Oops, we did it again. Broke the 4th wall that is. Our fearless leader Dan Brozo (Andy) has fallen through the infamous and much debated "4th wall", landing himself squarely in the center of a battle against THE King Koopa, Bowser (Rob). The wheel put us in Shadow Moses... the setting of Metal Gear Solid for this match against two reptilian ginger tyrants.

The Shyamalanian twist is that Andy is playing as Dan fighting against Rob playing for Dan. What? It's all here in this pamphlet.

Warning: Lotsa porn talk in this one...

Records after last episode:

Happy New Year!! We reign in 2015 with a battle between everyone's favorite marshmallowy super-thing, Kirby (Dirk) and a teenagiest mutantest ninjaiest turtliest Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle of them all, Raphael (Dan). It all takes place on the satellite of love from Mystery Science Theater 3000.

Warning: ORGASM!

Records after last episode: