Battlecast presented by Meltdown Comics

Well it's been almost three years. so we feel like we've definitely earned it.

Also more importantly, it's Christmas so none of us could get together to record and episode so we all picked some very classic Battlecast moments and threw them up into this disasterpiece of audio we call "It's a very Battlecast Best Of..."

Warning: So much nostalgia your feels will explode into so many pieces that you'll never use the word "feels" again because it's played out and annoying.

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Direct download: BEST_OF_BCAST.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 3:14am PDT

HO HO HO, Merry Holidays!

We get all Christmasy up in this biz with the non-childhood-ruining version of The Grinch vs the later-in-his-career-but-not-at-this-point-childhood-ruining Kevin McAlister played by Macaulay Culkin. Of course we fight in the world of A Christmas Story and all Christmas stuff in general because CHRISTMAS IS DOPE.

Jinglecast, jinglecast, jinglecast battle!

Warning: Not a white or green Christmas. It's a red one.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a holly jolly whositwhatsit. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: V02E19_The_Grinch_vs_Kevin_McAlister.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 4:21am PDT

We're here celebrating the release of two famously production-hell games. Also the new Spider-Man trailer. James rollin' deep at Prince Noctis from Final Fantasy XV and Dan gettin' webdiculous as Spidey-Dude. Last Guardian is the battleground because duh.

Battlenuts roasting on an open cast...

Warning: Tough life decisions all dayyyyy.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a radioactive bug of some sort. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: V02E18_Prince_Noctis_vs_Spider-Man.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 9:42pm PDT

Andy, while digging through some old Battlecast cards, found this absolute GEM. In what we (everybody except Dan) believe to be THE BEST piece of audio we've ever recorded, Dan defends his position and the honor of what we all know to be the fakest lady in history. Please listen to this. You will not regret it. 
 
Backstory: If you haven't listened to Season 9 Episode CF (between 8 and 9), Dan was tricked into straight up LOVING (not exaggerating) a girl he met online. Turns out this girl was using fake pictures from an actually pretty girl all along and Dan bit down hard on this fake bit of cheese. To add insult to injury, the girl she was using is an absolute dime who flies on private jets, has a super hot boyfriend, and the fact that Dan thought he had a chance was hilarious. What makes it even better, is that the real girl is the one you see in the episode art. A fat, cornfed, buttered 'sgetti eating lard who's married and just dying for the attention of someone not much better than herself, Dan. 
 
Prepare your ear holes because they're about to get the best gift we could give you this holiday season, this track. Enjoy. 
Direct download: Early_XMAS_Bonus.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 5:30pm PDT

Dave Chappelle, oh how we miss you. Your gig as host of SNL recently was not enough, so we brought you back to battle on this week's episode. Everyone's talking about the new Pokemon games too. Dirk's playin' 'em, and today he's gonna rock out with is Pokeball out as Rockruff. Furthermore, Planet Earth II is the best thing ever. Good lord you have so much to watch.

Closing time, one last call for Battlecast...

Warning: One of us used to be HARD. Or real sad.

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Direct download: V02E17_Dave_Chappelle_vs_Rockruff.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 2:54am PDT

 

Westworld is really awesome and we're all super into it. Let's fight there this week why not? Andy saw The Mummy playing at a bar this week so he's gonna be Imhotep. Dirk really digs the Dishonored games so he's gonna be the main character, Corvo Attano. It's a dope battle, but something's missing. Hmmm.

Some call it corn, we call it Battlecast.

Warning: Some Dr. Strange and Westworld spilers. Tasteful ones.

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Direct download: V02E16_Corvo_Attano_vs_Imhotep.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 2:30am PDT

A kickass little indie game came out recently. It's called Owlboy. Go check it out. Dirk and Dan have been playing the butt off of it, and Dirk even picked the main character, Otus as his hero this week.

Andy's been playing a lot of pin the tail on the donkey by himself in his underwear at home alone, so he picked George W Bush.

Let's do it in Arlen, TX this week, I'll tell ya hwhat.

When Battlecast shakes your hand, it stays shook.

Warning: Almost a complete absence of ribaldry.

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Direct download: V02E15_W_vs_Owlboy.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 3:35am PDT

We're sorry. The beginning of this episode assumed that people were better.

We finished up our Extra Life stream with another episode of Battlecast: this one. It's James playing one of the strangest wrestlers (yes, we know that's saying a lot) we've ever heard of, Broken Matt Hardy vs. one of the most vanilla characters in anything ever, the main guy from J.A.G.- LTCR Harm.

Battlecast has the best words.

Warning: WE SWEAR WE DIDN'T MEAN TO PREDICT IT

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Direct download: V02E14_Broken_Matt_Hardy_vs_Lt_Cdr_Harmon_Rabb.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 5:32am PDT

Firstly, thanks to everyone that tuned in and/or donated to us for Extra Life (you still can by the way if you feel like helpin' out a heck of a worth cause). We had an amazing time doing a double header of episodes as well as like 8 hours of DnD

Here's the first ep. we recorded that day- it's Doctor v Disease for this special edition of Battlecast. Rude crude viral dude, Thrax (the bad guy from Osmosis Jones) as played by Dirk goes tendril to tassle with kung-fu magic super-surgeon, Dr. Strange as played by Dan. Oh yeah and it's in some random Ukrainian city called Pripyat.

Battlecast it for the kids, maaaaan.

Warning: Andy's obsession with butt toys continues.

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Direct download: V02E13_Thrax_vs_Dr_Strange.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 5:53am PDT

One half of Battlecast takes over at Stan Lee's Los Angeles Comic Con! And by take over, we mean kicked it at a booth and shat the shit for a little. And by one half of Battlecast, we really only mean one third because it's just James and Dan.

They talk about how lame LA is, Don't Hug Me I'm Scared cosplay, various sitcoms from the 1990s, and why the heck we were up there in the first place.

We'll be back with a regular-style Battlecast episode next week. Enjoy some banter in the meantime!

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Direct download: V02E12_Stan_Lees_LA_Comic_Con_with_James_and_Dan.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 4:54am PDT

You should probably go watch Black Mirror on Netflix. They aren't paying us to say that, it's just really really good. Also it's our battleground this week so you will probably (100% definitely) hear some spoilers about it on this ep. It's ol' Danny Boy vs. ol' Dirkie Poo as the New Ghostbusters and the Sid Meyer's Civilization Narrator respectively.

Look! Up in the sky! It's a Battle! It's a cast! It's Battlecast!

Warning: WATCH BLACK MIRROR FIRST PROBABLY

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Direct download: V02E11_Civ_Narrator_vs_New_Ghostbusters.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 4:28am PDT

Have you ever found something on the internet that's so hypnotic and wonderful that you immediately fall in love with it and can't help but digest every single episode of it? No, dummy. We're not talking about Battlecast. We're talking about the Primitive Technology Channel. Go watch it. Also Andy is battling as the guy who runs it. He's frighting... erm, fighting against James as Stephen King's IT aka Pennywise.

These two unlikely enemies discover the whimsical world of The Princess Bride. But mostly just the Fire Swamps.

Never go in against a Battlecast... when DEATH is on the line!

Warning: Dan was not meant for stand-up

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Direct download: V02E10_The_Primitive_Technology_Channel_Guy_vs_IT.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 3:59am PDT

Unlike certain Republican presidential nominees, the Battle Boys are distinctly prosogynistic. To prove it, we welcome two females that sort of tolerate us. It's Mrs. Anneke "Married to Dirk" Stenger and Ms. Cora "Cora" Cora.

They'll judicate the battle that takes place in Lichfield Prison from Orange is the New Black between two characters that we're just shocked have never come up before. It's Dirk as peppy British speed demoness, Tracer vs Dan as the Lord of Portals and being locked in a lab with robots that sing about cake, Chell. My god the Portal games are fun.

The Battlecast is a lie.

Warning: Pancakes for breakfast.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being anyone but Piper <3 <3 <3

Direct download: V02E09_Tracer_vs_Chell.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 5:49am PDT

You thought, hoped, and the religious among you prayed that Lady Gaga was never to be used on the show again. If you needed more proof that we live in a cruel, godless world, I give you exhibit G: this god damn episode. It's James as Lady Gaga going bangs to sweaty forehead with Drik as Marvel's bulletproof Netflix star, Luke Cage.

Oh and probably much more importantly, the mystery guest that was previously accused of some pretty heinous groping is here to tell his side of the story.

Can't hear my, can't hear my, no you can't hear my b-b-b-Battlecast.

Warning: Battlecast sans-Dan is the best. Lol.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a split jury that just wants to go home and eat bagel bites in their underwear <3 <3 <3

Direct download: V02E08_Lady_Gaga_vs_Luke_Cage.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 4:34am PDT

BREAKING NEWS: Andy has been replaced on the show by Eric Baudour from Mega 64 so we're going to completely overhaul the show to be entirely about pro wrestling and devastatingly horrible internet videos. You're welcome.

Before the format changes though, we'll do a battle or something. It's Eric as the machoest man there ever was, Randy Savage. Dan's going with a hero of the only real wrestling there is. Cros wrestling. Steve Irwin. Neither one of them will be up to business as usual though because it's going down in the zombie infested mall from Dead Rising.

C'mon don't be scurred, you runnin' from Battlecast, that's what I heard.

Warning: Prepare the ear bleach.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a fortune cookie that reads "Ooooooh yeah!" <3 <3 <3

Direct download: V02E07_Steve_Irwin_vs_Macho_Man.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 7:45am PDT

Welcome friend of the show and coffee connoisseur and generally responsible adult, Elijah Elliot!

He's sitting in for ol' new-job-James this week as Brad Pitt's fast talking pikey from Snatch, Mickey O'Niell. Andy loves winning so he picked a character he was positive he'd win with. The best part of the last two X-Men movies, Quicksilver. Let's take these fellers deep under the sea to a lab. Sealab. 2021.

But oh I ain't evah seen a Battlecast fly.

Warning: Real Talk as fugh.

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Direct download: V02E06_Quicksilver_vs_Mickey_ONeill.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 4:35am PDT

Cartoon v Cartoon you say? Let's F'in' do this. It's ginger boy genius Dexter (Dirk) going head to spatula against punny burgerman, Bob Belcher (Dan). Hopefully you're well versed on your 1980s Colombian cocaine history, because this episode takes place in the setting of Narcos.

Battlecast kills bugs dead.

Warning: YOLOIAL

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Direct download: V02E05_Dexter_vs_Bob_Belcher.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 4:30pm PDT

*Trumpets and such* We are joined today by comedian/actor/bumble BFF of the show, Nick Rutherford!

Nick'll be battling this week as the peace-loving paintnik, Bob Ross. Let's see how he fares against the augmented cyber-bro Adam Jensen from Deus Ex. And heck! Why not put these two in the infamous Trump Tower in Las Vegas. Booyagggh.

If you get a Battlecast that lasts over four hours, seek immediate medical attention.

Warning: It's ok to smile when sad stuff happens.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a benevolent HVAC technician. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: V02E04_Adam_Jensen_vs_Bob_Ross.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 5:40am PDT

Welcome to another super duper out of control exciting edition of Battlecast presented by the super duper out of control awesome Meltdown Comics! We warned you to watch Stranger Things like a million times so hopefully you did that because (Dan) picked the electrokinetic wunderkind Elle/11 from Stranger Things as his character for this week. Dirk's been playing a lot of No Man's Sky so he went with the mysterious explorer and protagonist, The Traveler. James's ceremonial wheel spin landed us in the store from Sausage Party. Dope. Your mom should have taught you this, but always wipe from front to Battlecast. Warning: EVERY SPOILER EVER. You've been warned. <3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a drunk Tijuana stupor. <3 <3 <3
Direct download: V02E03_11_vs_The_Traveler.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:51pm PDT

There's a glitch in the mainframe of the internet that is allowing us to stay on Meltdown's network and also causes some of the gyms in Pokemon Go to turn yellow. We have our top scientists looking into it.

In the meantime: frazzled Magic School Bus pilot and damn fine lecturer, Ms. Frizzle (Andy) goes head to head against morphine addicted super-hacker, Mr. Robot (James). Hmm if only there was a place that brought nature and technology together in which they could fight... OH YEAH, hardcore survival game and winner of the coveted "This Shit's Been in Alpha for Longer than Computers Existed" award, RUST.

It puts the Battlecast on the skin, or else it gets the hose again.

Warning: Everything you wanted to know about video games but were afraid to ask.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a girl that called us ugly on OK Cupid. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: V02E02_Ms_Frizzle_vs_Mr_Robot.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 4:24am PDT

Volume 2 of Battlecast is upon us! Complete with a fancy new presenter, Meltdown Comics and fancy new lead vocals by Jon Bailey! Wooo!

Today's battle takes place in the totally-not-being-judged-by-anyone Rio Olympics between insane lady badass, Harley Quinn (James) and neurotic horsey jackass, Bojack Horseman (Dan).

Things heat up on the track and then cool down in the toxic green swimming pool. We don't recommend listening with headphone as close contact with this content may transmit Zika virus directly into your brain canal. Sorry.

Warning: Immediately gross as always.

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Direct download: S10E01_Harley_Quinn_vs_Bojack_Horsemans.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 2:49am PDT

It's finally here. Tempers ran hot, arguments were had, and James even broke a beer bottle over Andy's head. This may even be the last time we ever do a Battle Royale based on how much we all wanted to (for reals) kill each other afterward.

Basically what we're trying to say is that we've suffered for our art. In the same way that a 7-year-old suffers for that gold star emblazoned painting of a stick figure parakeet that mom and dad barely allowed on the fridge BUT STILL.

It's Dan vs. Andy vs. James in a tournament style showdown that will answer the two year long question: who got the best dice rolls?

Show me that Battlecast agaiiiin (Ooooooo, show me that Battlecast).

Warning: We'll never make you wait so long for or listen to another almost 3 hour episode again. Promise.


Dan has 4 characters, Andy has 3 characters, and James has 5 characters.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and, seriously, thanks for being a beloved supporter and good homie of the show. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: VOLUME_1_FINALE_-_SUPER_MEGA_ULTRA_BATTLE_ROYALE.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 7:59pm PDT

One more little baby special episode before we bring you the super sized... no King Sized... no... KING SOOPER SIZED Super Mega Hyper Battle Royale. Here's us fartin' around at SDCC 2016. We talk to people in costume and make them fight other people in costume. It's also on World Star Hip Hop if you want to watch the video.

Battlepix evolves into Ninecast. Duhhhh.

Warning: Some good burns mid episode.


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Direct download: S09ESDCC_Battlecast_at_SD_Comic_Con.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 5:18am PDT

This is not a normal episode of Battlecast. If you've been listening, then you know that this is us farting around at Dan's Gravyyard show last week. It's extra short, but hopefully it'll hold you over until next week when we have our HYPER SUPER MEGA BATTLE ROYALE followed by two weeks from now when we launch the start of VOLUME 2 of Battlecast. It's gonna be epic. We got some surprises in store for yas.

Gravycast enters the Battleyard.

Warning: You have to hear Dan's band.


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Direct download: S09EHH_Gravycast_Happy_Hour.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 7:39pm PDT

Remember like a million years ago when we did our D&D style co-op campaign version of Battlecast and you guys loooooooved it? Us neither. The love part. SO WE DID IT AGAIN. This time with super overpowered/holy grail characters because it's fun. Straight up Dungeons and Dragons style custom campaign written and performed by Dirk the Magnificent.

Our cast for this week is The Big Blue Dong of Justice AKA Dr. Manhattan (Andy), the bumbling yet lovable Superdoofus, Superman (James), and that dude who spends season of his show stuck on a single syllable, Goku (Dan).

IT'S-A-MEEE- BATTLECASTIO

Warning: Longest. Episode. Ever.

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Direct download: S09ESQ2_BATTLECAST_SIDE_QUEST_2.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 6:19pm PDT

It's the stunning conclusion to Season 9 of Battlecast. Move over, Game of Thrones! Move over, Silicon Valley! Move over, Murder She Wrote! There's a new Sheriff in town!

James and Andy are set up with some pretty OP stacked teams as they go into this one- Andy has Mary Poppins, The Tick, Robocop, Lego Batman. James has Donkey Kong, Ice Cube, A Warlock from Destiny, and Ratchet + Clank. Oh you poor sod, Dan. He only has Joe Camel. Wait didn't this happen last season too? Good lord.

As is customary in the Battle Royale, we revisit a buncha battlegrounds we've seen throughout the season.

Try to Cast your line into the deeper pools- that's where the Battles bite..

Warning: Buckle up.

FINAL RECORD BEFORE THE FINAL
Dan 1-5, Andy 4-2, James 4-2

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Direct download: S09E10_BATTLE_ROYALE.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 5:42pm PDT

IN SOVIET RUSSIA, THE CAST BATTLES YOU!!! No but really it does so watch out for that if you ever plan on traveling there. It's a battle between East Coast vs West Coast- in a rivalry almost exactly like that of Biggie vs. Tupac, it's Mary Poppins (Andy) vs. Bucky Barnes, The Winter Soldier (Dan). And if you haven't quite figured this part out yet, it all takes place back in the USSR.

Battlecastliness is next to Godliness.

Warning: Andy sings this episode.


Dan 1-4, Andy 3-2, James 4-2

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Direct download: S09E09_Mary_Poppins_vs_The_Winter_Soldier.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 6:52pm PDT

Welcome to This American Battlecast.

Today we take a break from battling to tell you a tale of heartbreak and hilarity.

In what has been hailed as the greatest episode of Battlecast ever, the boys go through an emotional journey and would like to bring you along for the ride.

Take meee out to the Baaaaattlecast.

Warning: You may cry.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being the real deal.. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: S09ECF_This_American_Battlecast1.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 7:58pm PDT

Special guest alert! It's the girl that is apprehensively letting Andy call her girlfriend! She's really sweet and does pretty good Young Frankenstein impressions. Hey! That's where we're battling this week! It's furry and furious donkey named monkey, Donkey Kong (James) vs. the guy that makes being a man in black look good, Agent J (Dan).

Disclaimer: Don't insert the Battlecast too far into your ear canal or you may cause permanent injury.

Warning: The Legend of Cora. The dog.


Dan 1-3, Andy 3-2, James 3-2

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Direct download: S09E08_Donkey_Kong_vs_Agent_J.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 2:00am PDT

It's a Battlecast milestone this week with the LAST EVER DIRKEO. Yes that's right. The Council of Elders communed and decided Dirk shall be a combatant next season so this is the last opportunity for any of the boys to choose him. Andy does. It's the pathetic and lovable Joe Dirk (Dirt) goin' head to head with the copiously armed furball/nutbolt combo team Ratchet and Clank (James). All o' this happens on Mars.

Amber Alert: Late-twenties, moderately overweight Battlecast in a silver 2010 Prius heading northbound on your ear-holes.

Warning: No one's ever happy with the odds.


Dan 1-3, Andy 3-1, James 2-2

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Direct download: S09E07_Joe_Dirt_vs_Ratchet_and_Clank.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 8:44pm PDT

**FIRST OFF DISCLAIMER**

Still working out kinks in the new studio and despite recording on two separate devices, the audio was still all jacked because we're dumb. So the quality of this episode is pretty shoddy. Well all of them are but this one particularly.

Annnnnyway- this week Andy and Dan both wuss out and call in pinch-battlers, but neither of them know who is battling for them until the end in a new-style-no-bias-battle. It's Gumby (Dirk) vs. Lego Batman (Cryin' Bitch aka Ryan Kidd) fighting in the Miiverse.

Fresh and full of Battlecast.

Warning: Foxes and racecars.


Dan 1-2, Andy 2-1, James 2-2

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Direct download: S09E06_Gumby_vs_Lego_Batman.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 11:58pm PDT

C'mon boys n girls! It's Candyland!! That's where we're dukin' it out today. Dirk's been playing a whole bunch of Starcraft II: Legacy of the Void recently so he picks Artanis (Dirk), and Dan's been smoking a whole bunch of Cigarettes: Legacy of the Lungs recently so he picks Joe Camel (Dan). We do the whole thing in a particularly long board game themed battle in good ol' Candyland. Or as Andy likes to call it... Andyland.


Eat a Battlecast. You're not you when you're hungry.

Warning: Romance and such.


Dan 0-2, Andy 2-1, James 2-1

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a very well fed bedbug. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: S09E5_Artanis_vs_Joe_Camel.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 9:19am PDT

We're lovin' it! 29 cent cheeseburger day at McDonalds that is. Does that still exist? No? Well Battlecast does, and this week it's robotic police cop, Robocop (Andy) vs. a big buff bald car guy from The Fast and the Furious, Dominic Toretto. We fight in a McDonalds Play Place. Now does all the cheeseburger talk make sense?


You gotta wrap it before you Battlecast it.

Warning: DAN DOESN'T HAVE STDs HE SWEARS


Dan 0-2, Andy 1-1, James 2-0

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Direct download: S09E04_Dominic_Toretto_vs_Robocop.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 7:48pm PDT

We're back from being total lazy piles and not being good at releasing consistent episodes! Dan's back in town, James quit his meth habit cold turkey, Andy's period finally came (oh god what a nail biter), and Dirk's government tell-all book is finally finished. THIS WEEK: Ren and Stimpy's favorite breakfast cereal and superhero combo, Powdered Toast Man (Dan) vs. Patrick Warburton's greatest role, The Tick (Andy) all fighting at the high school from Grease. Yay!


Don't get mad, get Battlecast.

Warning: Who the F knows the Grase soundtrack I mean come on.


Dan 0-1, Andy 0-1, James 2-0

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Direct download: S09E03_Powdered_Toast_Man_vs_The_Tick2.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 12:03am PDT

In this best ever episode of Battlecast Dan's not here. He's on some flavor of vacation which means we all get a bit of peace and quiet. Also, we get extra characters to use against him regardless if we win or lose. Florida Man, famous for his hilarious antics and alligator related incidents faces off the fearless Judge, not actual judge, Judy.
 
Rate us on iTunes, follow us on the social medei, listen to Battlecast, James is sorry we didn't put out an episode last week.

 

Direct download: BC_Sans_Dan_Feb.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 8:17pm PDT

This episode was inspired by the Paula Abdul song, Opposites Attract. It's old, white, pony-tail sporting ubernerd, and inventor of Dungeons and Dragons, Gary Gygax (Dirk for Dan) vs not old, not white, gangster rapping, Compton residing badass, Ice Cube (James). We fight in a Tardis because why not.

Never wear black without the Battlecast.

Warning: Andy being Andy.

Fresh new season with fresh new records!:
 
Dan 0-0, Andy 0-1, James 1-0

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Direct download: S09E02_Gary_Gygax_vs_Ice_Cube.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 11:40pm PDT

Season 9 of Battlecast! The 9th of our arbitrary season system! Isn't that exciting? You know what don't answer that. We're joined by guests Ryan Kidd (Jarngis) and Elijah Elliot (makes really bomb cold brew coffee- check out Red Hat Coffee on the web, fb, etc.), and somehow we keep the conversation relatively clean. Hmph. Today's battle is between Hawtpocketz, a Warlock Guardian from Destiny (James) and actor and all-around heart-throb Benecio del Toro (Elijah for Andy). Elijah brough us coffee so the wheel of destiny picked Starbucks as the battleground.

The best part of waking up is Battlecast in your cup.

Warning: Real-life advice that may actually be meaningful or something ew.

Fresh new season with fresh new records!:
 
Dan 0-0, Andy 0-0, James 0-0

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a first-wave organic food movement from the 1970s. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: S09E01_Benecio_del_Toro_vs_Guardian_a_la_Destiny.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 5:53pm PDT

It's after season 8 and not quite season 9 so you know what that means. A SPECIAL EDITION THEMED EPISODE WOOO. We've never done a 2v2 battle before so we give that a shot today. On the heels of the news that Matt Groening just signed a deal to do a new show on Netflix, we go Simpsons vs. Futurama. Friend of the show Ryan Kidd (aka Jarngis and every other NPC from our Side Quest episode) judicates and it's Hank Scorpio (Andy) and Fat Tony (Dirk) vs. Don Bot (Dan) and Bender (James). Bots vs. Boys. Dudes vs. Dudemotrons. Metaloids vs. Skinaloids. Ermm.

You're banned from the Battlecast. You and your children and your children's children... for three months.

Warning: I'm gonna go catch a bate.
 

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being an Australian bounty hunter's trusty bloodhound, Marvin. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: S08E2v2_Simpsons_vs_Futurama.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 7:06pm PDT

First off, thank you guys infinitely for listening to 100 episodes of Battlecast. We're super grateful for you guys, and we'll keep doing the show as long as we have folks like you tuning in.

So for our 100th episode we're doing something a little different and a little special. We're going on a side quest campaign D&D style with a few characters of our choosing. We seek the Draft of the Eldar, an ancient brew rumored to quench one's thirst for eternity. Will we find this legendary brew? Who knows.

Our cast for this week is the Elite Tauren Chieftan himself, E.T.C. (Dan), eastern european car theif from GTA 4, Nico Bellic (James), and one of Alan Rickman's finest portrayals Severus Snape (Andy).

Don't put Battlecasts on your pizza.

Warning: Boss battles are hard.

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a lost baby goat that somehow climbed the Statue of Liberty. <3 <3 <3

 

Direct download: Battlecast_SIDE_QUEST_01.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 10:31pm PDT

The exciting finale of Season 8 is here! Andy and James go head to head for the championship while Dan sits in the room and pretends he has a chance with his one character. Andy's force-heavy stacked team of four is Ezra, Mulder and Scully, Kylo Ren, and Leonardo di Vinci. James is rocking another kick ass team with Darth Maul, Lara Croft, The Phantom, and Roland Deschain. Dan has Venom. As always, the Battle Royale revisits all the battlegrounds we've used throughout the season in one edge-of-your-skeet spectacular.

Battlecast, the other white podcast.

Warning: Dan fell in love with a Tijuana stripper.
 
Dan 1-5, Andy 4-2, James 4-2, Dirk 0-8

<3 <3 <3 Thanks for listening, thanks for telling a friend, thanks for rating us on iTunes, and thanks for being a wallet sized school photo. <3 <3 <3

Direct download: S08E10_BATTLE_ROYALE.mp3
Category:Battlecast -- posted at: 3:43am PDT

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